Are ex-wives still relatives?

Dancinbaer

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
Joined
Apr 26, 2002
Posts
1,267
Loc
De Pere, WI
I got a kick out of this one, so thought I'd share.

My daughter was over yesterday. She said her mother (my ex)was wondering if I would frame a needlepoint for her.....are you ready...."for just the cost of materials". The softy I am agreed. My daughter called her mother who said she was going to JoAnn Fabrics for a price first becouse she has a 60% off coupon
faintthud.gif
 
Explains why you aren't married to her anymore!!
 
How tacky of her to have your daughter ask if you would do this!

Maybe it would be best to go ahead and let JoAnn's have that business.

Maybe if you offered to do it for free she would let you have her business!
 
Wow, Denny, I hope you won't agree to do it at cost after she price shops.......what a rude thing to do. I'd charge her double!
 
Let it go and be thankful she's taking it elsewhere...that is unless you are still on the best of terms with her. If you are, go ahead and explain that the big boxes do this as a ruse. I've had many people bring in quotes from Michael's and Hobby Lobby to compare. Usually I am slightly higher if it is a basic "slap it in a frame" type job. Do they ever actually sell framing at their "regular price"? If the client leaves it, great, if not, I explain some of the differences between us and give a 5 minute education on proper framing of art for preservation.. If they decide to go to the big box with this one they invariably bring me their higher end work.

I know most of my fellow grumblers will say I should match the price and "give the customer what they want". I choose not to take that approach because I'm working nights now keeping up with the work I have. I could hire someone with minimal training to do basic work and I may do that someday. I just closed a business where I had 33 employees at three locations and I rather enjoy being a one man show and profitable for the first time in three years. Big is not always better.

To answer your title question...

If you have children together she is effectively still a relative and so it should be for all concerned.

Dave Makielski

"Man is like an egg. Keep him in hot water long enough and he becomes HARD BOILED."
 
I’ve never been divorced, so I can’t put myself in your place, but I would probably be pretty bitter and refuse to do it. Either that or my “cost of materials” would be full retail plus 20%.

Let her be thrilled with quality of JoAnn’s. I’ve seen their work.
 
Denny, my guess is she was just trying to "tweek" you. Let her go to Joann's and pay the real money.
Lifes to short to get involved in psychological games.
 
Let me think about it...NO.

Your ex of all people in the world should realize the rudeness of the request. Just turn the tables and ask if she would provide whatever services she does for a living at cost. Denny, Denny, Denny...just where is that soft spot you have for your ex?
Geeze-O-Pete there is enough material in that one request for either a good short story or a stand-up routine.
(Can you tell I have an ex?)
 
Sure I would ... and I'd use paper mats, staple the sucker on with pot-metal staples...regular glass .. ... and not to forget the little bit of basement ooze that I'd smear onto the back of the needlework ... (let it fester for awhile, ...just to make it yummy ...)
 
What is "basement ooze"? Doesn't sound like it would meet FACTS standards. :rolleyes:

Denny- I'm sure this scenario really made your month. Tell her you'll take the price of the framing off her alimony.
faintthud.gif
Rick
 
Basement Ooze: the crud that accumulates under your soon-to-go-south waterheater ... or, even that nice flow that creeps under the wall of the high side of your cellar ... ya scrape it up (using thick rubber gloves, of course ...) ... and slather it onto .....yep.
 
Ok, I'll open myself up to slings and arrows. It's really tacky of her to shop around like that after putting your daughter up to asking.

But you two still have one connection: your daughter. What if you just sucked it up and did it for your ex wife? This would make you the bigger man, so to speak, and probably set a very fine example for your daughter.

Of course if she's a wretched shrew all bets are off. But tell her that yourself and don't trap your daughter in the middle. Been there, it sucks.

Now I shall duck and cover.
 
I'm with Framer Daveon one point, don't keep the child int he middle.

First question I would ask (other than about your relationship with her) is do you normally frame for relatives at cost of materials???? Shopping around aside, other than as a gift to my parents, everyone else I'm related to is told that this is how I make my living and my labor has some value. A small discount from my normal retail possibly (if I like them that day) but at cost, never.

And now that my children are grown, my Ex would pay double if she dared show her face in my shop.
 
The relatives who paid full price got their work done with the regular customer's work. Those who got a discount had to wait until I could fit it in.

If I were you, since you have agreed to do her item for cost of materials, I would put it with my stuff. Actually, below my stuff. My stuff took me forever to get to, if I got to it at all. I was taking home ten year old projects when I sold my shop.
 
Originally posted by FramerDave:
Of course if she's a wretched shrew all bets are off.
My, Dave, you have a way with words! I can see Denny right now, "Out! Out of my shop, wretched shrew!! Hie thee to a nunnery!! At ONCE!!"

I'm glad I'm on friendly terms. It takes a lot less effort to be civil than it does to sit around full of rage.
 
Are ex wives relatives? Nope, not a chance!

John
 
ex's relatives, not a chance.... I have an "ex-husband" and a beautiful daughter from that marriage, but I would probably charge him double and then give him a 50% discount... and if he shopped around to get a better deal, I would say... remember when you told me it was quality not quantity my dear......OUCH! hehehe

but back to your question, instead of being rude.. she should of gone to Joanne's fabrics first with the coupon and got a quote, then asked your daughter to see what your price would be... that would of been the nice thing to do..

Keep smiling...
Marion
 
WOW! Thanks everyone for making my weekend. Great responses. Like I said, I just got a kick out of it (not in the literal sense, the humorous sense).

And yes, that is why she is my "EX".

Actually, if she comes back and asks me to do it I'm going to thank her for price shopping Jo Ann's for me ;)

Everyone have a great weekend!!
 
My ex-husband helps me out here at the shop occasionally: door repair, drywall, insulation, ceiling leaks, handyman stuff....... and I remind him once a week to come take my trash to the dump (He has an SUV, I have a ford escort sedan). In return, I get to frame photos for him to give his family for Christmas, Birthdays......... at no cost!
We have two beautiful children, 6 year old boy, 4 year old girl, who live with me most of the time. Although they see their Dad almost every day. He irritates me, infuriates me and unfortunately he's a permanent part of my life since we have kids together.
Is he still a relative? Not mine, he's an ex-relative, but still the father of my children.
 
My ex husband keeps my Cassese 810 running like a top; but even before he did that I framed all his items for free (mostly photos of the children). His son by a previous marriage has two children whom I adore and am blessed to still have in my life. We agreed before the divorce to keep our two children a priority so we could attend their life moment events as a family. At Easter dinner my ex was here, along with the guy I date and it was smooth sailing.

But if he got a quote from Joann's I would make him a deal. He always would have to price shop at Michaels, Joann's and any other frame shop close enough as "payment" for framing.
 
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